summer breeze

i thought i'd do a bit of backtrackin today. backtrackin with a little bit of future-trippin thrown in. it's hot today in denver, and i really really really could use a summer breeze. and yes, that could be a metaphor. the live performance in the clip to follow was filmed in 1974. that, coincidentally, is the year i came out. i was 16. but undoubtedly , i had already been kissed.

i am certain that our culture has come forward quite a bit since then. but are we treating each other any better on a grass roots community level? i am not sure. do we still cat fight? do we still sharpen our claws on each other at every opportunity? do we see ourselves in each other and open our arms? or do we shut ourselves down a little and shoot up our defense systems?


here is an excerpt from susan kingston's talk in chicago about crystal meth and gay men. i love what she has to say here.


The elephant in the room here is how great crystal feels. But we don’t dare mention that. It’s as if
all the men who have survived this drug have taken a vow of silence about what was great about
crystal. Or if they do recount any glory they immediately must bookend it with a horror. We
might get closer towards the solution if we end this silence on the enjoyment on crystal. It seems
that if pleasure and thrill are part of the attraction, then we should be talking about that. Because
if we did, the conversation would really stop being about crystal, wouldn’t it? It would be about
what gay men are really yearning for –not getting high or getting fucked, but loving and feeling
loved. And when you start talking about that, crystal starts to seem pointless. And that’s how we
want men to view this drug.

But it’s becoming more difficult to honestly talk about drug and alcohol abuse. Alcoholics and
drug addicts don’t feature into the contemporary portrait of a gay man who is married, vacations
in Tuscany and Puerto Vallarta, takes his dog to doggy daycare, adopts 2 children, and still has
time to nursemaid the dating woes of his straight gal friends and selflessly offer male co-workers
advice on grooming products. Addicted fags make the rest of us look bad.

Unfortunately, our discomfort with the topic, on whatever basis, unintentionally reinforces the
acceptability of drug use. The silence only serves to substantiate and support the norm that gay


men like to get high and fuck. That’s just what they do. And I don’t think that’s acceptable. And
clearly you don’t either or you wouldn’t be here tonight.

The most powerful antidote we have is gay men talking to gay men. Not posters talking to gay
men. Gay men talking to gay men. And their doctors talking to gay men. And their women
friends talking to gay men. You know women are the real saviors and nurturers out there. We
covered your sorry asses at prom, and we’re still looking out for you!

Here’s another part of the solution. Ask men who are using crystal right now what THEY think.
Because we discount them as functioning, contributing beings, we discount their insight into
their own experience. There is valuable, self-aware, and observant wisdom out there that should
be tapped into. If you’re creating a poster campaign and ask meth users what they think only
after you’ve come up with a first design, you’ve already blown it. These guys can play an active,
creative and meaningful role in finding solutions.

i get the impression that some winds of change are rustling through our collective communities. that we are realizing that we need to move to another level of concern and caring for each other if we are to weather the political and emotional storms of modern gay culture. i welcome that wind. it feels refreshing.

and as the new crops of young men begin "coming out", they can incorporate these new understandings into their collective programming and move beyond where many of us seem to be "stuck". that would be progress now, wouldn't it?

i know there is a little background on the artists in the clip, but i like that here. it shows the fashion mindset then and is a nice contrast with how things are today. and as styles change, our clothes change and so do our community agreement fields.

if i close my eyes, i wonder if i can smell the jasmine....