garden party

a friend had a birthday party at his house on saturday evening and was kind enough to invite me. he turned 50 and he was celebrating. he is an amazing person in recovery and sponsors a good number of people who are trying to get clean. he has several years of clean time, is really somewhat of a mainstay in the gay recovery world, and i absolutely adore what he does for so many men.

i saw a whole lotta people who i haven't seen in awhile. i realized that i didn't really feel very comfortable in that crowd. i have become less entrenched in the world of meetings and i am not connected to very many of them. i am happy that so many are doing so well and getting clean, but i haven't shaken off my "counselor" skin yet and so i remain detached.

once i exchanged pleasantries with the birthday boy and shared a story or two, i then spent several minutes with another friend who is recovering from a bad fall and twisted ankles, and then i found myself ready to go. i had plans to go to see 3 mo' divas at the theatre. don't get me wrong, several wonderful people came up and said hello and asked how i was doing and i thoroughly enjoyed that. it was more that it was not easy to not know the true answer to "how i was". maybe it's a sign that i'm getting better. maybe it's a sign i have some growing to do.

i do know that i'm looking forward to a few more garden parties this summer. my friend keith is doing southern barbeque next monday for a sin gathering. and my 50th is going to be an outdoor to-do at the end of this summer. you are definitely invited if you like. labor day weekend- actually the saturday of that holiday weekend. i am looking forward to it. i hope i am a bit more comfortable at parties by then.

now here is an oldie. i found this site with a bit of trivia here. and you can find the entire lyrics here.