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Thursday, February 21, 2008

don't panic


image credit: elfwood

i wear extended-wear lenses and the night before last i woke with severe pain in my left eye. i had once again scratched my cornea. i protracted the lens and tried to go back to sleep. i slept some more, but it wasn't sound sleep.

yesterday at work, i found myself irritable with many things. the manner in which phone calls get transferred to my voicemail has been changed, so the phone rings while i'm in session with clients. i usually 4-8 calls transferred every 1/2 hour and each of those calls rings 4 times before voicemail picks up. i thought my head would explode.


one of my co-workers left the company last friday and so the other counselors, etc.. are picking up the slack. that means i am picking up slack as well. i have less then 10 percent the free time i normally enjoy to collect my thoughts, make phone calls, do individual session notes, return emails.

i have a couple of crises that have been presented to me and i am honestly trying to muddle through them with grace and love. but the above pressures are creating a sense of urgency inside me and causing me to second guess my actions. and i am finding it difficult to pause.

.........

.........

AHHHH - that's a little better....

SIN Colorado is having a UB2 happy hour 2nite and then i am going w/ some of the guys to see a local production of "Jeffrey". maybe my life doesn't completely suck today.

thank goodness i have had the privilege of working the steps. it allows me the grace to remember "this too shall pass" and affords me the luxury of relying more heavily on my faith at these times. but really owning that behavior is a process and i am discovering that blogging is part of that process for me.

thank you for allowing me the space to remember grace.


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

My goodness, I was getting stressed just reading that! I hate changes in my routine! Sound you're that way too.

Java said...

you are welcome. It's why we're here. I understand that need to blog.

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