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Tuesday, September 9, 2008

in the nick

italian made nik nik shirt from the 1970's

i am posting this youtube that was forwarded to me by a 12step program website. it made me smile and remember that there are always others making a similar journey out of hell. it's a blessing to watch them appear out of what seems to be nowhere, yet i guess they are right where they should be.

i have an idea of the tenacity required to keep a blog/vlog going during early recovery, as do others i know. i think it's a great way to journal and to reach out at the same time.

i want to tell him that recovery works. if i work for it as cleverly as i used to find dope it remains within my grasp. and it has shown me it is worth working toward.

am i crazy? this was the question i asked myself the most the first year i was getting clean. i now know i was seriously crazy by the end of my getting high days, but that first year... man, it was just as painful. quitting meth? maybe your hallucinations will stop now. the crazies don't stop for quite awhile. maybe you ARE losing your mind now that you've stopped using, or maybe you are just becoming unwound. maybe you quit just in the nick of time. either way, getting clean really felt like a drag! couldn't resist myself here. the second song this performer is lipsynching is my very very favorite la lupe number.

1 comment:

Marc said...

I always tell people in their first year that they're really not supposed to feel very serene. The disease is trying to make a last stand, and it has no intention of letting go without a fight. Many of them have the illusion they're supposed to feel "all better" relatively soon, and I reassure them that it's normal not to feel normal for quite a while.

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