CLOCK DVA 4 Hours 1981

 

image credit... alex ibsen 

This is a visual and aural slice of my 80's. The saturated color, the frenetic funmaking, the odd pairings, camp and macabre- sometimes when i look back, i smile. sometimes i wince. mostly, i remember the music. it soothed me and cajoled me and carried me to the next round.

This midmorning awakening

This bleak whiteness, nothingness

The eye that stares through your mirror

A suction entanglement

On stained sheets

Figures with no regrets

Their doubts caste a shadow here

The time drifts

The time swells

The skies melt

In my dream I am older

Everything is soft out of focus

There's this sound which disturbs me

A clarinet plays in the distance

Everything turns black and white

I must go to work

I know where it is

I've been there before

I'll go there this time

They will not have to force me

I'll go there willingly

I'll go there today

This could be New York

This could be London

I don't care anymore

I'm wearing this suit

A black suit

I'm wearing this time

A black tie

I'm carrying this case

A black case

I walk down the street

The people are staring

The taxi cab is slower

A piano falls from above

It smashes in front of me

I fall to the floor

I open this door

I'm back in my room

I see two people asleep

This midmorning awakening

This bleak grey whiteness, nothingness

The eye that stares through your mirror

I see two figures asleep

They look older

You look Older

We're all older

Let us join them in their dreams

We're only four hours

We're only four moments

We're only here too long

beauty and grace

photo credit alex ibsen

"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom."
~ Marcel Proust ~

the above work is a brainchild of one of the sweetest inspirations that has crossed my path since i have gotten clean in denver.(who resides in denver) i met him when i served on the board of rocky mountain roundup last year and worked with him on the fundraising committee. we threw parties together for a year and i found that he inspired me to be better somehow.

he is definitely an artist. he is talented, he is intense, and he brings some magic and some validation to my life. he struggles, he takes chances, he stays grounded, and he pursues his muse. of course he has a partner, who is equally gracious and engaging. i love them both.

anyway- i just got a print of the work pictured above. we went to lunch and just caught up as i hadn't seen him in a month or so. i am in a period of shifting, my priorities, my career, and my safety nets. his friendship is an oasis.

i am so very grateful for friendships and especially for alex. i am better for the fortitude and the grace he demonstrates. i am humbled by his naivete and floored by his wisdom. sometimes i don't think i deserve good friends.... but those thoughts are beginning to fade more quickly in recovery. that would be another great thing i give thanks for.