beautification

My garden is my most beautiful masterpiece. Claude Monet

the idea of beautification can easily be multi-faceted, but the definition in my head as i scribe is in this vein. a very littered or trash-filled park or neighborhood can undergo a beautification process to get cleaned up and be much more pleasing to the eye. there can be a unifying process that happens in which many different parts be tweaked to make a more cohesive whole.

i daresay that has become the intention of our project in denver this week. we have a small sample of indidivuals from the southern, northern, and western parts of the state, along with more people from our central capitol, together sharing a learning process as well as an empowering process and hopefully becoming a stronger and more connected core.

i am learning so very much this week in many facets. i see there is so much i don't yet know, i am largely increasing my awareness of my fellow coloradans, i am humbled by my gap in understanding peoples' strengths and weaknesses, and i can uncomfortably but quietly see how much growing up i still need to do.

the differences between so many of us seem vast, yet the shared experience of diagnosos and surmounting that barrier is striking and vivid. each persons presence is a witness to the sheer audacity of our human spirit. and it definitely dwarfs the idiosynchratic differences that use to be the only quality i could see in others.

i am proud to be involved in this one-on-one exercise i am today. i am not sure of all the reasons i have landed in one of the leadership positions i have, but i cannot balk. yesterday, there were at least 3 crises with participants that pulled me awsy from my personal agenda, and i was reminded of my capability to deal with crises. and the rest of the class was none the wiser. this hopefully is a sign of my growing up. and becoming a part of a bigger whole.

today's sound choice may be quirky, but somehow apropos in my mind. this is not my favorite musical at all, and yet it seems the lyrics seems to speak directly to my intention here. michael crawford and sarah brightman with "music of the night" from phantom of the opera.

soul vacation

Now that shes back from that soul vacation tracing her way through the constellation, hey
She checks out mozart while she does tae-bo reminds me that theres time to grow, hey
Now that shes back in the atmosphere,I'm afraid that she might think of me as
Plain ol' jane, told a story about a man who is too afraid to fly so he never did land

another chapter is preparing itself in my world. the train is leaving the station and the destination is really unknown at this point. i hope for good things. i pray for understanding and patience, and i trust in the guardians that protect me.

i begin a new position on april 6. i will try to take the weekend before that for a getaway somewhere... ideas welcome. definitely a soul vacation.

i look forward to the new gig. it will be strange, no doubt, and will require stretching my boundaries a bit- maybe more than a bit.

i have started running the park again. i am amazed at just how much weight i have put on this winter. i think some of the gain is probably emotional.

today's sound choice is a repeat for me- train with "drops of jupiter"

Train - drops of jupiter
Uploaded by b_careful

you're invited to nibble and mingle

The Rebuilt+ Committee of Denver, along with Strength In Numbers is hosting a welcome gathering for the trainers from New York along with the participants from outside Denver who are participating in the "train the trainers" launch of HIV One On One later this month in Denver. Please come by to say hello, have some laughs, wish them good luck, and bring a dish to share. I hope we can demonstrate what good hosts live in Denver. The date, location, and time is listed below. Come by and nibble and mingle.


Nibble and Mingle Small Front

Publish at Scribd or explore others: Periodicals & Report denver strength in numbers

Nibble and Mingle Small Back

Publish at Scribd or explore others: Periodicals & Report denver rebuilt+

today's sound choice is "the start of something new" from disney's high school musical. believe me, i get some irony here....

rainbow connection

it ain't easy being green....

i cannot convey accurately the sheer bliss that fills me at this juncture of my life. i could never have imagined that just surrendering to recovery would have led me down such a path. it's never perfect, however, it is sublime. even when i'm busy and dizzy, it is mixed with trust and perspective.

i am so busy these days, i can barely remember what rested feels like. this is, of course, a platinum problem. and i try to remember that.

i have a friend working on a website for T E N (treatment education network). we have a new little logo which is the boggle letters and i like that. we have 5 pages we are looking to have on the site for the start. it's gotta be kinda fast because the funding i was given for it runs out in march.

this is just a tiny thing i have been playing with. i am sure i will change it 50 times before we put it up. the hope is that it will be health and wellness info and have many contributors. i just want it to have some 5280 flavor in its stories and its perspectives.

take a look.. this is a blog only that i am showing.. it will be linked to the main page..

ontheten

and here is a peek at the splashpage for the site... on the ten

am going to santa fe for a couple of days later this week. am blissfully working on yet another project and i also get to give my almost brother of a cousin a little getaway for his birthday.


today's sound choice is jason mraz doing kermit's "rainbow connection"

is it love

For reasons that are not mysterious
Morality's used as a tool
The poor are told to be contented
But in this life they've no choice at all

Don't help me I can save myself
If I'm incomplete don't fill the gaps
Save me from the people who would save me from myself
They got muscle for brains... gang of four

Last week, the Senate Business, Labor and Technology Committee voted 4-3 to approve SB88, the bill that would provide critical health insurance benefits for the domestic partners of Colorado state employees. Now the legislation moves to the Senate Appropriations Committee for consideration. Should the measure be successful in committee, it will then move to a floor vote and then on to the state House, so we need you to act!

Contact your legislators and urge them to support this common-sense legislation that brings additional financial security to state employees in this unsettling economy.

Then, on February 16th, join us and other lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender Coloradans and our allies for Equal Rights Colorado's Annual Lobby Day. For more information or to RSVP, please contact Mindy Barton at mbarton@glbtcolorado.org.

Come meet your legislators in person, so they'll think of you as a constituent when they consider how to vote on issues of equality.

Warmly,

Joe Solmonese
President, Human Rights Campaign

for further information don't hesitate to please click here

today's sound choice is a vintage (that's oldspeak for old) gang of four doing "is it love". sidenote- my best friend mark stephens and i saw this band live no less than four times. i can't remember more because, well frankly, i did have a substance abuse issue. i still love them today...

Is It Love - Gang of Four

the first to say goodbye

Colorado Anti-Violence Program and It Takes A Village Applaud Aurora Police Department for Thorough Investigation

On November 3, 2008, less than four months after the murder of Angie Zapata in Greeley, CO, Amie Wilcoxson was found deceased in her apartment by neighbors. Community members, including the transgender community that had included Angie and Amie, voiced concerns over the initial investigation by Aurora Police Department. Many had a heightened sense of awareness around issues of violence and increased vulnerability around their own personal identities.

Lieutenant Stef and Victim Assistance Supervisor Carole O’Shea met with community members on November 24, providing a forum for people to voice concerns about the investigation as well as process grief. While waiting for reports to come back regarding the cause of death, many people were anxious to receive more information about the case.

On February 6, 2009, Lt. Stef and Ms. O’Shea returned to It Takes A Village, along with lead Detective Stowell and coroner James Hibbard to provide a presentation on the investigation. Staff members of CAVP and It Takes A Village were impressed with the dignity and respect given to Amie throughout the process. Det. Stowell had a powerpoint presentation with many details about the investigation and explained, step-by-step, how decisions were made. Mr. Hibbard explained that his job is to determine the cause and manner of death. Based on medical reports, the cause of death was determined to be multiple drug toxicity. Amie consumed toxic levels of medication, all of which was prescribed to her. While Det. Stowell provided information about suicidal ideation, Mr. Hibbard provided scenarios to explain that it could not be determined whether the manner of death could be ruled accidental or suicide. The official manner of death is undetermined.

Many questions have been answered and fears about hate-violence have been calmed, but we are now faced with mourning the death of a member of our community. Amie Wilcoxson was a peer outreach worker for It Takes a Village’s TransAction program and was very active in the transgender community. She strongly advocated for the rights of the transgender community in employment, health care, substance abuse treatment, housing and more. She was a loving friend who exuded positive energy to those around her. She will continue to be missed.

While we do not know if Amie was suicidal, we know that she was experiencing some difficult emotional issues around the time of her death. We must remember to take care of each other and to take concerns and messages around suicide seriously. The number for the National Suicide Hotline is 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433).


Kelly Costello
Director of Victim Services

Colorado Anti-Violence Program
P.O. Box 181085
Denver, CO 80218
www.coavp.org

good bye dear amie.. may you find peace... may all of us find just that..

today's sound choice is the unforgettable gladys knight and the pips with "neither one of us". now willie... this may be well before your time, but this is a prime lesson from gay 101.... 'cuz girlfriend gladys sang it for all of us....