impaired
adj 1: diminished in strength, quality, or utility; "impaired
eyesight" [ant: unimpaired]
2: mentally or physically unfit [syn: afflicted]
chinese calligraphy for "shit"
i have been a bit distracted lately. not sure why really. there is a lot on my plate right now. i think i am afraid i will not do something well. or will fail at something. or expect some impending doom. i know i write here often about expecting good things to happen, and i believe that. to a point. then i revert back to my old ways of doomseeing and doomsaying. god is it tedious.
i am becoming a substance abuse counselor, as well as doing hiv plus advocacy work and some days it is quite draining. i am honestly happy to do the work. i just get a tad blown away when i am lied to, and manipulated, and tested, and challenged on a fairly steady basis. and then i have the charge of witnessing men abusing themselves and torturing themselves emotionally and physically. and i know that in most cases, it is the brain that is fucked and not the person. i guess i am just gonna have to allow myself to be human once in awhile and work through taking some of this shit personally.
when i call somebody on their discrepanies, am i doing the right thing? do i just let them continue to bullshit me and themselves? is that what is called meeting the client where they are at? you know, most of the time, this is really not a problem for me. i feel a bit guilty writing about it here. but i do want any tweakers who might be reading this, to know that people in my position actually do care. sometimes we have to figure out the best approach to caring. and that approach is different with everyone.
on a lighter note- rocky mountain roundup had a bbq and no-talent show last nite. i think 80 or so people came. it was sedate, jovial, and civilized. the most fascinating thing to me is that people are genuinely friendly most of the time at these functions.
and in keeping with the lighter note
i think i mentioned the talking wall before. i have to work through that whole idea and the mile high meth project booth before the end of next week. i really need a compelling question about hiv to ask in conjunction with the "how has crystal meth touched your life?" you can check the original out for yourself here... Crissy's Talking Wall
i am especially intrigued by the cyberwall. there are so many eerie bits there.
tina's talking wall
i'm not crazy, i'm just a little impaired.
http://www.addme.com/#1
2 comments:
"when i call somebody on their discrepanies, am i doing the right thing? do i just let them continue to bullshit me and themselves?"
yes by all means call them on it!! it is called accountability----when you screw up you must be held accountable
in my work within the mental health system I see many people being excused for their bad behavior simply because of their illness--I firmly believe that there is impaired thinking, judgment while unstable or off their meds but being held accountable is the only way to insure compliance with treatment
I too find it difficult not to take on my clients problems as my own---which is not healthy for me---but like you I have been there done that so know exactly how they are feeling---all you really can do is show them recovery IS possible---you are living proof---they do not have to just accept things will not be any better
best of luck to you in your advocasy work---you may be only one voice---but believe me someone will be listening and isn't that the whole point.....
thanks so much for your support. i do try to give people a glimpse of another option. NOT USING. sometimes they are just not ready to look. and i do remember being there....
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